It's CHRISTmas Time, again...

Now there were in the same country shepherds living out in the fields, keeping watch over their flock by night. And behold, an angel of the Lord stood before them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were greatly afraid. Then the angel said to them, "Do not be afraid, for behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy which will be to all people. For there is born to you this day in the city of David a Savior, who is Christ the Lord. And this will be the sign to you: You will find a Babe wrapped in swaddling cloths, lying in a manger." And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God and saying: "Glory to God in the highest, And on earth peace, goodwill toward men!" Luke 2:8-14 NKJV I've come to the conclusion that I love everything CHRISTmas represents, yet hate everything it has become. There was a time not long ago, a far more innocent time in the life of our country, when Christ was part of CHRISTmas. Churches, Town Halls, city parks & private residences put up manger scenes to pay tribute to the birth of Jesus. People joyfully wished one another "Merry CHRISTmas!" without any thought to political correctness. No one thought it offensive in any way that the message of Jesus' birth was part of the CHRISTmas story. After all, the United States had been founded as a Christian nation, built on Biblical principles and the Ten Commandments were the basis of our laws. Then one day someone stood & said we shouldn't pray in school and Christians sat back while that became the law of the land. Suddenly, someone said they were offended by the mention of Christ in CHRISTmas & the greeting should be changed to "Happy Holidays" to be more inclusive of other religions & non-believers as well. Again, Christians sat back & let it take place. Then someone said, nativity scenes shouldn't be part of CHRISTmas because they represented a "Christian" holiday & America is now home to many people groups & ethnic groups & many from varying religious backgrounds--besides, America is no longer a Christian nation. Once again, Christians sat back & said nothing. That brings us to where we are today. CHRISTmas is now a holiday (no longer a holy day) full of commercialism & greed. Department stores begin stocking shelves and advertising for CHRISTmas right along with their back-to-school sales. Massive multitudes of people line up to get the best bargains & generally act anything but Christ-like in their endeavors to obtain the toys & trinkets their children want. We no longer read the story of the birth of Christ in our homes as part of CHRISTmas. We've simply put GOD in a box, so we can pull Him out when needed rather than living a life of faith and dependent on Him for every breath as we should be. GOD, help us to see our need for You--to turn back to you--to teach our families of you. Forgive us for taking You out of our lives & draw us once again close to You. Show us the need to remember that CHRISTmas begins with Christ and He should be the center of our lives, not only at CHRISTmas but every moment of every day of every year--as long as there is breath in our bodies. Let there once again be peace on earth and goodwill among men... Blessings! Tony

Not Ashamed...?

For I am not ashamed of the gospel of Christ, for it is the power of God to salvation for everyone who believes, for the Jew first and also for the Greek. Romans 1:16 NKJV You know, this has always been one of my favorite Bible verses. We started a study on the book of Romans at church recently & as this scripture passage was discussed, I was prompted to ask myself, "Do I live for GOD unashamedly?" I've been pondering this for some time & I've decided I do OK in some area & fail miserably in others. I suppose that is normal for us as human beings, but I'm not satisfied with being "OK" or "normal" in my Christian life. I want to do more, be more, love more, serve more--just be Jesus to those I come in contact with. I've lived a good life for the most part. I made some bad choices in my young years that I wish I could have a do over on, but GOD still saw fit to use them in some way. I was blessed to raise 3 children, 2 biological & 1 step, but I've always simply said I had 3 kids. I wasn't always the best role model or a perfect parent for them & I made a lot of mistakes over the years (more things I wish I could do over). They've seen much of my bad side, but I pray what they remember is the good part in years to come. In spite of all my failures, they've grown & matured into fine young people of whom I am proud. I recall my grandmother (Granny to us & all our friends who came to visit) claiming me for ministry when I was 8 years old. In my mind, I see us standing in the kitchen of her old house & tears of praise and happiness streaming down her cheeks as she proclaimed that I would someday be a great man of GOD & that He would use me in some way to minister to others. I received that proclamation with great fear--ministry was never a vocation I considered for myself. Almost immediately, I began running from that calling. In just a few years time, my running took me down a path that involved drugs, alcohol & women. Those things have been the downfall of many & but for the grace of GOD & His plan for my life, I could easily have become a statistic & cut my life short through my own stupidity. Through all of it, GOD had His hand of protection on me. He still planned to use not only me, but the very sins I had committed against Him, in ministry. There is little of this world that hasn't touched my life in some way. But, GOD still calls me His child & in a time of great distress, when I thought all was lost & I had no hope--I called out to Him. He should have turned His back on me as I had Him--but He reached out to me, saved me, cleansed me, and put me back on the path He had planned for me. True, I had taken a detour from the planned route but He still planned to use me. There have been a lot of twists & turns along the path but I try to walk this life one day at a time, trusting Him for my needs. I never imagined I'd find myself single & alone at this point in my life but I'm also accepting that as part of GOD's plan. People tell me I should marry again but I'm not sure about that. I had a horrific first marriage, but a wonderful second marriage. I don't think I'll ever duplicate the good one & I certainly would rather be alone that take a chance of duplicating the bad one. For now, I'll just be me & leave it at that. Slowly, I feel I am finding purpose once again in life. I have some concerns about my ability to continue doing the type of work I do with my back issues--but, once again I'll just have to trust GOD with that and continue moving forward. Regardless as to what the future holds, I pray I'll live unashamedly for GOD & proclaim Him wherever I go. I'd like to please GOD & do Granny proud. I appreciate your prayers! Blessings! Tony

"Thanksgrieving" part 2...

"The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away; Blessed be the name of the Lord." Job 1:21b NKJV Here it is another Thanksgiving & CHRISTmas will be here soon. I'd like to say things are better this year than last, but it doesn't appear that way at all. Honestly, year 2 of widowhood has been harder than year 1--yet through it all, GOD has been good. My mind drifts back to seasons past when all seemed right with the world--at least from my limited perspective anyway. We take much for granted in this life. I assumed that Dee & I would have many happy years together. I never imagined that her life, and along with it the life we shared together, would end so soon. But, it did... Grief & sorrow are naturally part of our earthly life. As long as we live, we are subject to the ups & downs of life itself. Solomon spoke of such things in Ecclestiastes when he wrote, "To everything there is a season, A time for every purpose under heaven: A time to be born, And a time to die; A time to plant, And a time to pluck what is planted; A time to kill, And a time to heal; A time to break down, And a time to build up; A time to weep, And a time to laugh; A time to mourn, And a time to dance; A time to cast away stones, And a time to gather stones; A time to embrace, And a time to refrain from embracing; A time to gain, And a time to lose; A time to keep, And a time to throw away; A time to tear, And a time to sew; A time to keep silence, And a time to speak; A time to love, And a time to hate; A time of war, And a time of peace." (Ecclestiastes 3:1-8 NKJV) So, while I suspect it'll be some time (& maybe never) before I'm ready to dance--at least maybe I'm at the point I am ready to begin the healng process. GOD has begun to open doors of opportunity for me & finally, I feel I'm at a place where my experience & training may be put to Kingdom use. It is a good feeling to think all I have endured in life can help others in some way, or at least give me the insight I need to offer wise counsel on life issues. I don't know what the future holds, but I know who holds the future. I think maybe it's time to work towards moving forward and working on living, laughing & healing. I'd appreciate your prayers for my journey. Blessings! Tony

Evolution does exist!

"in a moment, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trumpet. For the trumpet will sound, and the dead will be raised incorruptible, and we shall be changed. For this corruptible must put on incorruption, and this mortal must put on immortality." 1 Corinthians 15:52-53 NKJV Yes, you read that title correctly--I said evolution does exist. Granted it doesn't exist in the form Darwin theorized & taught, but it does exist still the same. Think about this--Abram became Abraham and Jacob became Israel. These men were changed (a form of evolving) from who they originally were to who GOD intended them to become. In the same way, a lost person becomes saved. A change takes place in his or her life that changes that individual's very existence. The old is gone and a new man (or woman) takes their place. That person's character changes, their goals and aspirations in life change, their very way of living changes. That's evolution... It's true that some changes are immediate and some take time to incorporate themselves into our lives once we become Christ-followers. Certain old habits may take their leave of us right away while others will take time to train our flesh to do without. I've heard of people who were miraculously delivered from drugs, alcohol, tobacco, pornography, profanity, etc., at the time of their conversion. But, I've also encountered those who had to work at breaking those old worldly & sinful habits. That's evolution too... Also, as we grow and mature in our life & faith--we change as well. Life events take place with marriages, births, deaths, etc., that cause changes in our physical & emotional lives. Likewise, we become more trained in the things of the Spirit as well the longer we live as Christians and seek GOD's will & direction in our earthly lives. That's evolution as well... Then, there is the final change when we shed this earthly body and trade it for the heavenly body promised to the Saints of GOD when our earthly life is over. We cross over to new dimension where pain & sorrow no longer exist and all is glorious & joyful for eternity. There is no need for any further evolvement--we have arrived in GOD's Kingdom forever to reign with Him. That is the greatest & final evolution... Question is...are we doing our part to complete the evolution process? Are we following the commandments of GOD? Are we spending time with Him daily in prayer & Bible reading? Do we seek to grow His Kingdom by adding to its numbers in bringing others to a saving knowledge of Jesus? What about it? Are you evolving? Blessings! Tony

The Power of Love...

Beloved, let us love one another, for love is of God; and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God. He who does not love does not know God, for God is love. In this the love of God was manifested toward us, that God has sent His only begotten Son into the world, that we might live through Him. In this is love, not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son to be the propitiation for our sins. Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. 1 John 4:7-11 NKJV Love...It is hard for me to imagine a love so deep that a father would willingly sacrifice his son to express it. I mean, I have children & I can't wrap my brain around the idea of giving my child to ransom others. I can, however, envision myself fighting like a madman to protect them. So, what would motivate our great GOD to do such a thing? LOVE--a love so deep, so boundless that He would go to any extreme to make a way for us to come back to Him. John 3:16-17 tells us, "For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through Him might be saved." Imagine that--GOD loved mankind so much that He offered up His only Son as the perfect and willing sacrifice for the atonement of our sins. He did it to provide a way of salvation so we could fellowship with Him for all eternity in Heaven rather than give us what we deserved by sending us to hell, forever separated from Him & tormented by Satan & his demons. Nothing we could ever do can repay Him. However, we can live our lives in submission to Him--seeking His Will daily & honoring Him by showing GOD's love to those we encounter in our daily lives. It is amazing what a smile or a kind word can do to shine light into the darkness for an individual. We should reach out to those in need, and the world is in need of a Savior. This world needs an anchor to hold to when the storms of life come. We are called to be "salt & light" to the world (Matthew 5) and lovingly guide wayward souls back to the Father. I can't begin to express how GOD has blessed me through the years by placing people in my life who loved me despite myself & who pointed me to or back to Him. My desire is to do the same for others--to be the hands & feet of Jesus and show others the way to Him. As always, I covet your prayers... Blessings! Tony

My Place in This World...?

"For My thoughts are not your thoughts, Nor are your ways My ways," says the Lord. "For as the heavens are higher than the earth, So are My ways higher than your ways, And My thoughts than your thoughts." Isaiah 55:8-9 NKJV The wind is moving But I am standing still A life of pages Waiting to be filled A heart that's hopeful A head that's full of dreams But this becoming Is harder than it seems Feels like I'm Looking for a reason Roamin' through the night to find My place in this world My place in this world Not a lot to lean on I need your light to help me find My place in this world My place in this world If there are millions Down on their knees Among the many Can you still hear me Hear me asking Where do I belong? Is there a vision That I can call my own? I heard this song today. I don't recall hearing it in years. Michael W Smith sang it & it came out in the early 90s--some twenty years ago. Twenty years ago I was a much younger man--I felt alive, my faith was strong, many of life's harsh realities had yet to assault me. I felt like I had goals & a purpose in life... Fast-forward to today...I wonder where that fired-up young man went with his passion for the things of GOD, his desire to make a difference. Life has a way of bringing us to our knees, literally. It spins out of control, clawing away at our very souls--all the while, Satan roars with laughter as we fall further & further away from the things of GOD & the plans He has for our lives. We fight & we struggle, trying to do things in our own power and in our own ways--failing to seek GOD's guidance through His Word or prayerfully communicating with Him to get guidance & build our spiritual strength. We allow the things of this world to contaminate us, to confuse us for no other reason than that we are no longer sensitive to the things of GOD because of our affiliation with the world, it's political correctness and ungodly philosophies. The shame of it all is that it doesn't have to be that way. If we turn our attention back to the things of GOD, if we turn our backs on the world, if we live our lives in total submission to the One who created us and knows us intimately, the One who desires to meet our every need--we can stay on track without the distractions. Suffice it to say that I struggle in many areas. What I know in my heart to be true, I often counteract with my words & actions. I seem to have been knocking on a lot of locked doors lately in my efforts to "help" GOD & I've been in a holding pattern for what seems forever. My desire is to be used by GOD but I often wonder if I am making any headway. Does what I do matter? Can GOD still use me in spite of my many failures? Will He open a door for me to serve Him in some ministry capacity? As always, I covet your prayers as I seek to fulfill my GOD-given life's destiny and find my place in this world... Blessings! Tony

My Purpose/His Plan?

Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart Be acceptable in Your sight, O Lord, my strength and my Redeemer. Psalm 19:14 NKJV It's been a while since I've felt compelled to write anything at all. I'm in a place of limbo, or so it seems. Ideas present themselves that seem good, but none have panned out so far so I guess either I'm misreading things or GOD doesn't see me as ready yet. I've been trying, sometimes successfully & sometimes not, to move forward with my life. I never anticipated I'd be in this place--at least not at this point in my life. I've started dating again & well, it's complicated. While I enjoy having companionship, sharing dinner, seeing a movie, etc., I feel far from ready for anything near an exclusive, committed, serious relationship. I still have a lot of work to do on myself, with GOD's help of course. I don't know yet what GOD has in store for me. I wait. I pray. I wait some more. Still, nothing seems to materialize. It's a struggle because more than anything, I want to live a life that reflects the love of GOD. I desire to contribute, to make a difference--yet, no doors seem to open for me. Is my future here, where I currently live or does GOD have other plans for me elsewhere? Does some ministry exist that I am to fill or have I attained all that I will in this life? Will I live out the remainder of my life alone or will GOD bring someone into my life at some point to share this journey? These questions and a multitude of others plague my mind. Satan taunts me--telling me I don't matter, that I'm not worthy, that GOD can't use me because of my past. I know these are lies but when GOD seems silent, my humanity begins to question both my purpose and His plan. I look to The Word & see "For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope" (Jeremiah 29:11 NKJV). I know in my heart GOD cannot lie & that satan is the father of lies, yet I feel somewhat purposeless as I wait. GOD help me to see through Your eyes, to hear with Your ears. Grant me the wisdom & discernment to know Your perfect Will and to follow where You lead in complete submission and obedience. Truly let my words and thoughts be acceptable in your sight and allow me to be a reflection of You in all I say & do while I'm waiting. This is where I find myself for now. I'd appreciate the prayers of GOD's people. Blessings! Tony