And He said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness." Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in needs, in persecutions, in distresses, for Christ's sake. For when I am weak, then I am strong. 2 Corinthians 12:9-10 NKJV
I began this blog one year ago today--on my 49th birthday. Today, I'm 50 & I've been doing a lot of reflecting on my life. There's something about the realization that you are half a century old that makes you look at your life & evaluate the accomplishments and failures you've experienced through the years.
Much has happened in the past year. I welcomed my first grandchild into the world last November. I said goodbye to & buried my wife this past May. These things cause one to ponder his own mortality. Life is filled with both joys and sorrows. GOD is present through it all.
GOD's grace & mercy have sustained me through the years. On my own, I am nothing--yet with GOD in my life and at my side, I can accomplish anything. I've given a lot of thought to GOD's grace & have decided that, like a beautiful diamond, grace is multi-faceted. There are different types of grace made available to GOD's children, depending on what circumstances they are facing. He is always merciful & always faithful--even when we are not faithful to Him. He is an ever-present help in times of need.
Hebrews 4:16 instructs us to "come boldly to the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need." Granted--when we are hurting, reeling from the pain and heartache of losing something or someone precious to us--it's difficult to feel "bold" at all. We feel vulnerable, yet GOD still extends His amazing grace. We're not promised that because we accept Christ as Savior, that our lives will be easy. However, we are promised that God will walk with us and carry us if need be through the difficult & painful times in our lives (Isaiah 43:2-3 & 46:4).
Once we experience salvation & make Christ the Lord of our life, the Holy Spirit takes up residence in our heart. Our body truly becomes the temple of GOD. GOD is triune--Father, Son & Holy Spirit. That being said, if the Holy Spirit lives within us, then GOD walks alongside us throughout life. GOD feels our pain, He witnesses our failures, He knows the temptations we face, yet His grace knows no limits. For the Lord God is a sun and shield; The Lord will give grace and glory; No good thing will He withhold From those who walk uprightly (Psalm 84:11).
Honestly, I still have questions, I still don't understand why my wife had to die. Still, I trust that GOD has a plan for it all and that He will use this in some way to bring honor & glory to Himself. I pray daily that He will use me in some way to point people to Him & that I will always be found in the center of His Will.
Where are you? What are you facing? Are you high on the mountaintop or deep in the valley of despair? Wherever you are & whatever your need, His grace truly is sufficient. Trust Him...
Blessings!
Tony
Sunday, August 28, 2011
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
Spiritual Adultery...
Adulterers and adulteresses! Do you not know that friendship with the world is enmity with God? Whoever therefore wants to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God. James 4:4 NKJV
Wow, that gets your attention now doesn't it? What does it mean? We Christians are supposed to be tolerant, forgiving & non-judgemental aren't we? As a matter of fact, we are. What we are not supposed to be is accepting of or participating in the sins of the world. We must reach out to those who are lost without allowing them to drag us into the things of the world. How? Well, let's see what the Bible has to say...Therefore submit to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you. Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded. (James 4:7-8 NKJV) How do we draw near to GOD? We spend time communicating with Him in prayer. We read His Word. We sit under annointed preachers of the Word. We choose godly friends. We're also told that a double-minded man is unstable in all his ways...(James 1:8 NKJV).
Often, we think we can dabble in sin and get away with it. GOD's Word says differently. We're told in Numbers 32:23b, "and be sure your sin will find you out". The fact that we've accepted Christ and committed our lives to Him does not give us a license to commit willful sin. When we do, yes when--not if, because we are rebellious children--there are consequences. One way being that our testimony is tarnished and our effectiveness for GOD's Kingdom is diminished. As for me, I never want to bring shame to GOD & I definitely want to have opportunities to serve Him and minister to others.
How can we be in love with GOD and in love with the world at the same time? There are no fence-straddlers. We are either being used by GOD or being used by Satan. Exodus 34:14 states, "for you shall worship no other god, for the Lord, whose name is Jealous, is a jealous God". You may be questioning that statement and thinking you aren't guilty of worshipping any other gods--how about money, possessions, popularity, a relationship, etc? Those things easily become idols in our lives if we aren't careful.
Jesus Himself said "I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me."(John 14:6) Notice He didn't say I am "A" way, He said I am "THE" way. Don't be fooled by those who say there are many paths to GOD--that is false teaching at it's best and a downright lie of the devil. Are you an Oprah fan? She subscribes to this doctrine. She has a great following--sadly, Satan is using her to lead people astray. But wait--she does so many good and charitable things...Yes, she does--but you can be a goodly person without being a godly person. I'm here to tell you that if Oprah is saved, she needs to repent and if she isn't--that she will bust Hell wide open regardless as to how much good she has done in the world.
I know for a fact that I have allowed worldly things into my life. I'm fully aware that I do & say things regularly that damage my testimony. I pray GOD will forgive my spiritual adultery and allow me to be useful in His Work. How about you? Where do you stand? Remember, a friend of the world is an enemy of GOD. Personally, I want to be called a friend of GOD...
Blessings!
Tony
Wow, that gets your attention now doesn't it? What does it mean? We Christians are supposed to be tolerant, forgiving & non-judgemental aren't we? As a matter of fact, we are. What we are not supposed to be is accepting of or participating in the sins of the world. We must reach out to those who are lost without allowing them to drag us into the things of the world. How? Well, let's see what the Bible has to say...Therefore submit to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you. Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded. (James 4:7-8 NKJV) How do we draw near to GOD? We spend time communicating with Him in prayer. We read His Word. We sit under annointed preachers of the Word. We choose godly friends. We're also told that a double-minded man is unstable in all his ways...(James 1:8 NKJV).
Often, we think we can dabble in sin and get away with it. GOD's Word says differently. We're told in Numbers 32:23b, "and be sure your sin will find you out". The fact that we've accepted Christ and committed our lives to Him does not give us a license to commit willful sin. When we do, yes when--not if, because we are rebellious children--there are consequences. One way being that our testimony is tarnished and our effectiveness for GOD's Kingdom is diminished. As for me, I never want to bring shame to GOD & I definitely want to have opportunities to serve Him and minister to others.
How can we be in love with GOD and in love with the world at the same time? There are no fence-straddlers. We are either being used by GOD or being used by Satan. Exodus 34:14 states, "for you shall worship no other god, for the Lord, whose name is Jealous, is a jealous God". You may be questioning that statement and thinking you aren't guilty of worshipping any other gods--how about money, possessions, popularity, a relationship, etc? Those things easily become idols in our lives if we aren't careful.
Jesus Himself said "I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me."(John 14:6) Notice He didn't say I am "A" way, He said I am "THE" way. Don't be fooled by those who say there are many paths to GOD--that is false teaching at it's best and a downright lie of the devil. Are you an Oprah fan? She subscribes to this doctrine. She has a great following--sadly, Satan is using her to lead people astray. But wait--she does so many good and charitable things...Yes, she does--but you can be a goodly person without being a godly person. I'm here to tell you that if Oprah is saved, she needs to repent and if she isn't--that she will bust Hell wide open regardless as to how much good she has done in the world.
I know for a fact that I have allowed worldly things into my life. I'm fully aware that I do & say things regularly that damage my testimony. I pray GOD will forgive my spiritual adultery and allow me to be useful in His Work. How about you? Where do you stand? Remember, a friend of the world is an enemy of GOD. Personally, I want to be called a friend of GOD...
Blessings!
Tony
Tuesday, July 12, 2011
Weeds, Wildflowers or Roses?
While I'm still far from normal--some would say I never have been--I'm attempting to move forward after losing my sweet bride. Truth is, I have some pretty good days & some that are purely awful but GOD sees fit to send people my way to uplift and encourage me still the same. The following seems rather random to me, but it's been percolating in my head for a few days now so I decided to put my thoughts down & see if it spoke to anyone. Here goes...
If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask Him! Matthew 7:11 NKJV
Often we bounce along down the rough & rocky road of life, making mistakes and bad choices along the way. One bad decision seems to lead to another, and then to another. Suddenly, we begin to feel as if we deserve nothing good in life because our view of ourselves becomes distorted. We see ourselves as worthless--unworthy of of the blessings GOD so desires to bestow upon us. Instead of accepting the beautiful rose He offers from His garden, we're content with a few wildflowers from along the roadside or worse yet--just a patch of weeds.
The rose is a symbol of all things bright and beautiful--the gifts He has in store for us if we open ourselves completely to His Will, follow His commands and live a Christian life. The wildflowers are the things we allow to distract us and cause us to detour from GOD's path for our lives--a consolation prize if you will. We accept them because we think we are undeserving of good things from His hand, or in an attempt to be humble. GOD wants to give us His best, but because we can't boldly accept that--we shorthange ourselves, and in doing so, shortchange GOD in the process. Sometimes, we sell ourselves short (and GOD as well) and are content to wallow in the weeds. The weeds are the useless things of the world--trash, if you will.
The problem there is that, in being content with the weeds, we live more like the world than as Christians and damage our testimony as well as the Kingdom of GOD in the process. If we're OK with the weeds, why would lost people have any desire to become Christians? They see us living just like them with the exception of calling ourselves Christians. If Christianity is simply seen as a set of rules that heap guilt on a person--well, why would anyone want that?
It's time we, as Christians, tend to our gardens and get rid of the weeds in our lives as referred to in Galatians 5:19-21 which states, "Now the works of the flesh are evident, which are: adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lewdness, idolatry, sorcery, hatred, contentions, jealousies, outbursts of wrath, selfish ambitions, dissensions, heresies, envy, murders, drunkenness, revelries, and the like; of which I tell you beforehand, just as I also told you in time past, that those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God." We need to stop being distracted by weeds & wildflowers and start cultivating GOD's beautiful roses. We should take Him at His Word and live our lives accordingly, seeking out the gifts He has for us and blessing others along the way.
I know I've been guilty of wallowing in the weeds and contenting myself with wildflowers as well as doing things on my own rather than asking for GOD's guidance & direction. Where are you? Among the weeds, the wildflowers, or are you pruning the rosebushes in anticipation of a beautiful bloom?
Blessings!
Tony
If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask Him! Matthew 7:11 NKJV
Often we bounce along down the rough & rocky road of life, making mistakes and bad choices along the way. One bad decision seems to lead to another, and then to another. Suddenly, we begin to feel as if we deserve nothing good in life because our view of ourselves becomes distorted. We see ourselves as worthless--unworthy of of the blessings GOD so desires to bestow upon us. Instead of accepting the beautiful rose He offers from His garden, we're content with a few wildflowers from along the roadside or worse yet--just a patch of weeds.
The rose is a symbol of all things bright and beautiful--the gifts He has in store for us if we open ourselves completely to His Will, follow His commands and live a Christian life. The wildflowers are the things we allow to distract us and cause us to detour from GOD's path for our lives--a consolation prize if you will. We accept them because we think we are undeserving of good things from His hand, or in an attempt to be humble. GOD wants to give us His best, but because we can't boldly accept that--we shorthange ourselves, and in doing so, shortchange GOD in the process. Sometimes, we sell ourselves short (and GOD as well) and are content to wallow in the weeds. The weeds are the useless things of the world--trash, if you will.
The problem there is that, in being content with the weeds, we live more like the world than as Christians and damage our testimony as well as the Kingdom of GOD in the process. If we're OK with the weeds, why would lost people have any desire to become Christians? They see us living just like them with the exception of calling ourselves Christians. If Christianity is simply seen as a set of rules that heap guilt on a person--well, why would anyone want that?
It's time we, as Christians, tend to our gardens and get rid of the weeds in our lives as referred to in Galatians 5:19-21 which states, "Now the works of the flesh are evident, which are: adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lewdness, idolatry, sorcery, hatred, contentions, jealousies, outbursts of wrath, selfish ambitions, dissensions, heresies, envy, murders, drunkenness, revelries, and the like; of which I tell you beforehand, just as I also told you in time past, that those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God." We need to stop being distracted by weeds & wildflowers and start cultivating GOD's beautiful roses. We should take Him at His Word and live our lives accordingly, seeking out the gifts He has for us and blessing others along the way.
I know I've been guilty of wallowing in the weeds and contenting myself with wildflowers as well as doing things on my own rather than asking for GOD's guidance & direction. Where are you? Among the weeds, the wildflowers, or are you pruning the rosebushes in anticipation of a beautiful bloom?
Blessings!
Tony
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
Thank You for the Rain--a poem by me, today--6/22/2011
Thank You for the rains, Dear Lord--
for they hide my tears.
Lord, my heart is heavy--
my mind is filled with fears.
The love I thought would last a lifetime--
is here with me no more.
For she left this world, it's pain and sorrow--
and entered Heaven's door.
While I'm certain her homecoming there--
was joyous from the start,
Her passing from this old world--
has surely broken my heart.
I know she is rejoicing--
in Heaven's great hereafter,
But I miss her touch and her smile--
I long to hear her laughter.
My home feels so empty--
there's such a stillness there.
My heart seems to know no peace--
this grief is hard to bear.
When I catch myself feeling
as if I'm starting to enjoy life,
I feel a twinge of guilt tell me--
I should be mourning for my wife.
How long, Oh Lord, will this last--
this emptiness I feel?
Give me strength to press on--
as I seek to do Your Will.
For now, Lord, my heart cries out--
in anguish and in pain,
Grant me grace, Father, and once again--
thank You for the rain...
for they hide my tears.
Lord, my heart is heavy--
my mind is filled with fears.
The love I thought would last a lifetime--
is here with me no more.
For she left this world, it's pain and sorrow--
and entered Heaven's door.
While I'm certain her homecoming there--
was joyous from the start,
Her passing from this old world--
has surely broken my heart.
I know she is rejoicing--
in Heaven's great hereafter,
But I miss her touch and her smile--
I long to hear her laughter.
My home feels so empty--
there's such a stillness there.
My heart seems to know no peace--
this grief is hard to bear.
When I catch myself feeling
as if I'm starting to enjoy life,
I feel a twinge of guilt tell me--
I should be mourning for my wife.
How long, Oh Lord, will this last--
this emptiness I feel?
Give me strength to press on--
as I seek to do Your Will.
For now, Lord, my heart cries out--
in anguish and in pain,
Grant me grace, Father, and once again--
thank You for the rain...
Sunday, June 19, 2011
Grief Continued...
"I am troubled, I am bowed down greatly; I go mourning all the day long. For my loins are full of inflammation, And there is no soundness in my flesh. I am feeble and severely broken; I groan because of the turmoil of my heart. For I am ready to fall, And my sorrow is continually before me." Psalm 38:6-8, 17 NKJV
I wish I could say things have gotten easier for me. They haven't. Few moments pass that I don't think about my wife, her zeal for life, her desire to serve, her love for GOD and His people. She possessed so many wonderful attributes. She touched so many lives--mine most of all.
In High School, she was a cheerleader. In life, she was also a cheerleader. She always pulled for the underdog, she befriended the friendless, she was a great encourager. Bless her heart, she bragged on me as if I was something special. 2-3 times a week, I found a note of encouragement in my lunch, folded in my bath towel, left on my pillow. She gave me way more credit than I deserved. However, in her eyes, I was special & that made me feel special--as if I could accomplish anything. She saw me through love's eyes, she had great faith in me and was willing to support me in whatever I chose to do, wherever I chose to go. Never have I known so great a love, other than that of GOD Himself.
Not too long ago, I found several cards she had given me over the years. Needless to say, I sat & wept as I read all the sweet things she wrote to me. I hear songs that remind me of her. I see her personality in the home we shared. We both loved the outdoors, so I think about her when I'm out in nature. It's something I can't escape--nor do I want to. I know time will soften the pain I feel but I never want to forget our life together or erase her from my mind. We shared something special & I know GOD brought us together for a reason--even if only for a short season.
Sorrow can be overwhelming. It is like a storm--it hits without warning and leaves disaster behind. I can be going about my business doing relatively well and suddenly it is as if someone has punched me in the gut and knocked the wind out of me. It may last a few minutes, a few hours or sometimes a few days, leaving me feeling lifeless. Slowly, it passes & I return to some degree of normalcy once again--until the next storm comes. Grief and mourning truly are a process--one that takes time. How long? Only GOD knows...
Still the same, I saw Dee suffer so. I know she isn't in pain any longer. I know she's in Heaven. I know she's rejoicing. I'm a little jealous in some ways. But the hardest part is I know I must continue on without her until my earthly life is done. I know GOD has a purpose for me but I long for my reunion with her...
That's where I am for now. I covet your prayers!
Blessings!
Tony
I wish I could say things have gotten easier for me. They haven't. Few moments pass that I don't think about my wife, her zeal for life, her desire to serve, her love for GOD and His people. She possessed so many wonderful attributes. She touched so many lives--mine most of all.
In High School, she was a cheerleader. In life, she was also a cheerleader. She always pulled for the underdog, she befriended the friendless, she was a great encourager. Bless her heart, she bragged on me as if I was something special. 2-3 times a week, I found a note of encouragement in my lunch, folded in my bath towel, left on my pillow. She gave me way more credit than I deserved. However, in her eyes, I was special & that made me feel special--as if I could accomplish anything. She saw me through love's eyes, she had great faith in me and was willing to support me in whatever I chose to do, wherever I chose to go. Never have I known so great a love, other than that of GOD Himself.
Not too long ago, I found several cards she had given me over the years. Needless to say, I sat & wept as I read all the sweet things she wrote to me. I hear songs that remind me of her. I see her personality in the home we shared. We both loved the outdoors, so I think about her when I'm out in nature. It's something I can't escape--nor do I want to. I know time will soften the pain I feel but I never want to forget our life together or erase her from my mind. We shared something special & I know GOD brought us together for a reason--even if only for a short season.
Sorrow can be overwhelming. It is like a storm--it hits without warning and leaves disaster behind. I can be going about my business doing relatively well and suddenly it is as if someone has punched me in the gut and knocked the wind out of me. It may last a few minutes, a few hours or sometimes a few days, leaving me feeling lifeless. Slowly, it passes & I return to some degree of normalcy once again--until the next storm comes. Grief and mourning truly are a process--one that takes time. How long? Only GOD knows...
Still the same, I saw Dee suffer so. I know she isn't in pain any longer. I know she's in Heaven. I know she's rejoicing. I'm a little jealous in some ways. But the hardest part is I know I must continue on without her until my earthly life is done. I know GOD has a purpose for me but I long for my reunion with her...
That's where I am for now. I covet your prayers!
Blessings!
Tony
Monday, May 23, 2011
Good Grief?
And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away. Revelation 21:4 NKJV
I've come to the conclusion that grief is a process--there is no on/off switch. However, no two people grieve the same. GOD created us as individuals--with varying characteristics, talents and abilities. Therefore, life events, such as the loss of a loved one, affect each of us differently.
For me, there are days I feel strong and social and others when I prefer to isolate myself so I can mourn privately. Upon returning home after Dee's funeral, I was immediately and undoubtedly in a state of depression. For the first few days, I had what I termed "meltdown moments" when raw emotion would consume me for unspecified periods of time. I went several days without concern for my appearance or my well-being--I neither shaved, showered or ate. This was my time of intense mourning.
Many people visited, called, brought food, sent cards--all offering their condolences, but I was unable to be consoled. I had been absolutely certain GOD would restore my wife to me as He had done in the past. When she died, I felt hurt, betrayed and abandoned by GOD--my faith was truly shaken. I called out to GOD seeking answers and expressing my anger for His having allowed her to die.
I was reminded of a couple of incidents that had occurred. I was sure they were meant to warn and prepare me for her homegoing. About two weeks prior to Dee's death, I had a dream in which I was getting my clothes for the day out of our Master Bedroom closet. Dee's clothes were always in that closet and mine were in the guest room closet. She always loved clothes & shoes, so there was no room in "our" closet for my clothes. For my clothes to be there would mean her's no longer were...
Also, the night before Dee's funeral--I had great difficulty sleeping. As I lay there, I prayed to GOD to grant me peace and rest. Otherwise, I knew I would never be able to deal with the entire funeral process. Miraculously, I drifted off to sleep only to awaken some hours later singing--yes, singing the song "Marvelous Grace of Jesus." I knew that was GOD's way of comforting and reassuring me that His grace was all sufficient for even me--as the song goes. I heard a radio preacher say "Mercy responds to a cry for help" and GOD had done just that for me.
I've accepted Dee's death as GOD's Will. I am grateful for the time she & I had together. She was my soulmate. We did everything together so her passing has left a hole in my heart and life, but I know she is happy and whole and in the presence of our Saviour. If I had the ability to wish her back, it would be to the state she lived in for the last two years of her life & that simply wouldn't be fair to her. I still have occasional meltdowns and I still have days I prefer to be alone. The mourning process is ongoing and I have no idea how long it will last but through it all, GOD is my strength. He gives me what I need as I need it in order to endure.
I'm grateful for the thoughtfulness and prayers of my friends & family during my time of loss. Oh, and by the way--I have showered, shaved & eaten--so, it's safe to be around me now...
Blessings!
Tony
I've come to the conclusion that grief is a process--there is no on/off switch. However, no two people grieve the same. GOD created us as individuals--with varying characteristics, talents and abilities. Therefore, life events, such as the loss of a loved one, affect each of us differently.
For me, there are days I feel strong and social and others when I prefer to isolate myself so I can mourn privately. Upon returning home after Dee's funeral, I was immediately and undoubtedly in a state of depression. For the first few days, I had what I termed "meltdown moments" when raw emotion would consume me for unspecified periods of time. I went several days without concern for my appearance or my well-being--I neither shaved, showered or ate. This was my time of intense mourning.
Many people visited, called, brought food, sent cards--all offering their condolences, but I was unable to be consoled. I had been absolutely certain GOD would restore my wife to me as He had done in the past. When she died, I felt hurt, betrayed and abandoned by GOD--my faith was truly shaken. I called out to GOD seeking answers and expressing my anger for His having allowed her to die.
I was reminded of a couple of incidents that had occurred. I was sure they were meant to warn and prepare me for her homegoing. About two weeks prior to Dee's death, I had a dream in which I was getting my clothes for the day out of our Master Bedroom closet. Dee's clothes were always in that closet and mine were in the guest room closet. She always loved clothes & shoes, so there was no room in "our" closet for my clothes. For my clothes to be there would mean her's no longer were...
Also, the night before Dee's funeral--I had great difficulty sleeping. As I lay there, I prayed to GOD to grant me peace and rest. Otherwise, I knew I would never be able to deal with the entire funeral process. Miraculously, I drifted off to sleep only to awaken some hours later singing--yes, singing the song "Marvelous Grace of Jesus." I knew that was GOD's way of comforting and reassuring me that His grace was all sufficient for even me--as the song goes. I heard a radio preacher say "Mercy responds to a cry for help" and GOD had done just that for me.
I've accepted Dee's death as GOD's Will. I am grateful for the time she & I had together. She was my soulmate. We did everything together so her passing has left a hole in my heart and life, but I know she is happy and whole and in the presence of our Saviour. If I had the ability to wish her back, it would be to the state she lived in for the last two years of her life & that simply wouldn't be fair to her. I still have occasional meltdowns and I still have days I prefer to be alone. The mourning process is ongoing and I have no idea how long it will last but through it all, GOD is my strength. He gives me what I need as I need it in order to endure.
I'm grateful for the thoughtfulness and prayers of my friends & family during my time of loss. Oh, and by the way--I have showered, shaved & eaten--so, it's safe to be around me now...
Blessings!
Tony
Friday, April 15, 2011
My Revelation...
Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. I Thessalonians 5:16-18 NKJV
I had an astonishing revelation today. For months, I have been praying for GOD to change Dee's health situation & to heal her completely. I've bombarded the gates of Heaven, pleaded with GOD and asked others to pray the same. What I failed to realize all this time was that GOD is using this time of trial & testing to prepare us for something great. We know He plans to use us in ministry & have made preparations to do just that. However, we've been viewing this long episode of continued health problems as an attack of satan rather than realizing that GOD uses all things for the good of those who love Him & are called according to His purpose as stated in Romans 8:28, which I happen to claim as my life verse. How could I recite that Scripture for so many years without truly applying it to my life?
The first clue came a few days ago when a dear friend posted a comment to a FaceBook post of mine saying that GOD was using this time to prepare us & that we would have a great testimony as a result. Hmmmm, I thought--could this be? I began reading my Bible and seeking GOD somewhat differently as a result. My actual "Aha moment" came today. I spent the day at the hospital as Dee has been hospitalized several days now & was having a procedure done in the heart cath lab. After they took her back, I stopped by the hospital's gift shop to look around. They have a used book rack that I frequently glance over & usually never see anything that appeals to me.
Today, however, was different. As I studied the books on display, I noticed one titled "Power in Praise" by a gentleman named Merlin Carothers. Being intrigued, I picked it up and thumbed through it. I decided to pay the whopping .50 the gift shop was asking for it so I'd have something to read while I waited. On page 2, Romans 8:28 was quoted along with this, "To praise GOD is to express our acceptance of something that GOD is permitting to happen. So to praise GOD for difficult situations, as sickness or disaster, means literally that we accept its happening as part of GOD's plan to reveal His perfect love for us." My mind was screaming, WHAT? I'm supposed to be thankful & praise GOD for the auto accident & long-term illness that has plagued my beautiful bride for the past 5 years?
The more I read of my bargain book, the more it explained my life verse to me along with several others. Mr. Carothers, having retired as a military chaplain, recounted many stories of personal encounters with people over the years who reacted just as I did. He told of how their situations changed once they came to terms with and accepted their situations. Could it be true? Could GOD use this to build our character, to prepare us, to teach us--so we will be able to minister to others? GOD's Word, my very life verse of Romans 8:28 says "all things" so I'm thinking that's what I was supposed to learn. Why else would GOD place this book in my path at a time when I'm questioning Him about the purpose for Dee's suffering? You might say it's a coincidence, but I choose to believe He was trying to get the message through my thick skull and having a pastor's wife tell me apparently wasn't enough...
So, I'm looking at things differently now. If I am to be a living, breathing testimony of His great love--I have to accept that bad things happen as a part of life and remember the story of Joseph. All the terrible things he endured led him to a place of prominence where he was able to make provision for not only his family, but for all of Egypt. He told his brothers who had sold him into slavery, "you meant evil against me; but God meant it for good, in order to bring it about as it is this day" (Genesis 50:20 NKJV).
It is something to think about. Have you been accusing GOD of deserting you as I was? Maybe it's time to rethink His ability to use "all things" for His ultimate glory...
Blessings!
Tony
I had an astonishing revelation today. For months, I have been praying for GOD to change Dee's health situation & to heal her completely. I've bombarded the gates of Heaven, pleaded with GOD and asked others to pray the same. What I failed to realize all this time was that GOD is using this time of trial & testing to prepare us for something great. We know He plans to use us in ministry & have made preparations to do just that. However, we've been viewing this long episode of continued health problems as an attack of satan rather than realizing that GOD uses all things for the good of those who love Him & are called according to His purpose as stated in Romans 8:28, which I happen to claim as my life verse. How could I recite that Scripture for so many years without truly applying it to my life?
The first clue came a few days ago when a dear friend posted a comment to a FaceBook post of mine saying that GOD was using this time to prepare us & that we would have a great testimony as a result. Hmmmm, I thought--could this be? I began reading my Bible and seeking GOD somewhat differently as a result. My actual "Aha moment" came today. I spent the day at the hospital as Dee has been hospitalized several days now & was having a procedure done in the heart cath lab. After they took her back, I stopped by the hospital's gift shop to look around. They have a used book rack that I frequently glance over & usually never see anything that appeals to me.
Today, however, was different. As I studied the books on display, I noticed one titled "Power in Praise" by a gentleman named Merlin Carothers. Being intrigued, I picked it up and thumbed through it. I decided to pay the whopping .50 the gift shop was asking for it so I'd have something to read while I waited. On page 2, Romans 8:28 was quoted along with this, "To praise GOD is to express our acceptance of something that GOD is permitting to happen. So to praise GOD for difficult situations, as sickness or disaster, means literally that we accept its happening as part of GOD's plan to reveal His perfect love for us." My mind was screaming, WHAT? I'm supposed to be thankful & praise GOD for the auto accident & long-term illness that has plagued my beautiful bride for the past 5 years?
The more I read of my bargain book, the more it explained my life verse to me along with several others. Mr. Carothers, having retired as a military chaplain, recounted many stories of personal encounters with people over the years who reacted just as I did. He told of how their situations changed once they came to terms with and accepted their situations. Could it be true? Could GOD use this to build our character, to prepare us, to teach us--so we will be able to minister to others? GOD's Word, my very life verse of Romans 8:28 says "all things" so I'm thinking that's what I was supposed to learn. Why else would GOD place this book in my path at a time when I'm questioning Him about the purpose for Dee's suffering? You might say it's a coincidence, but I choose to believe He was trying to get the message through my thick skull and having a pastor's wife tell me apparently wasn't enough...
So, I'm looking at things differently now. If I am to be a living, breathing testimony of His great love--I have to accept that bad things happen as a part of life and remember the story of Joseph. All the terrible things he endured led him to a place of prominence where he was able to make provision for not only his family, but for all of Egypt. He told his brothers who had sold him into slavery, "you meant evil against me; but God meant it for good, in order to bring it about as it is this day" (Genesis 50:20 NKJV).
It is something to think about. Have you been accusing GOD of deserting you as I was? Maybe it's time to rethink His ability to use "all things" for His ultimate glory...
Blessings!
Tony
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